How Was Rep. Wilson To Know?

After Republican Rep. Joe Wilson made his outburst during President Obama’s speech to Congress last night, he came out with an apology.

Because I felt like partaking in some pure foolery, my version of the night’s events are in bold. The rest is straight from CNN’s Political Ticker.

WASHINGTON (CNN) — GOP Rep. Joe Wilson of South Carolina issued a statement Wednesday night apologizing for his outburst during President Obama’s speech to Congress:

“This evening I let my inner hater loose! let my emotions get the best of me when I was kind of listening to the liar’s President’s lies remarks regarding the coverage of illegal immigrants in the death to America health care bill. Sometimes when you’re upset, things just slip out. What’s a little “You lie!” every now and then? How was I supposed to know people would get upset? I did feel

P.A.S.S. Does Not Equal National Work Skip Day

To: Staff

From: If You Don’t Know Who I Am By Now You Shouldn’t Be Working Here

Subject: P.A.S.S. or Parentally Approved Skip School Day

Staff:

I’ve heard rumblings that some of you are planning to keep your children home from school on September 8^th because you don’t want them viewing the live feed from President Obama’s Back to School Speech. You don’t want him indoctrinating your kids with his Commie-speak. And that’s completely your prerogative. What I want to address is how this “Parentally Approved Skip School Day” will affect your work on Tuesday. Let me put it plainly so there’s no confusion: IT WON’T. It’s rather sad that I have to list what is unacceptable, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to do it.

Just because your kids are not in school doesn’t mean we want them here.

The Missing C

Go here to watch the related video.

Setting: The dictionary and thesaurus decide to watch television while the owner of the home is away.

Thesaurus: It’s my turn to have the remote today, so get ready to watch whatever I want. In fact, after what you made us watch last time, I’m just going to put it on scan and we’ll watch whatever the TV lands on.

Dictionary: But what if it’s something you don’t want to watch either? Wouldn’t it be easier to just pick a channel yourself?

Thesaurus: It’s my day to pick, so I’ll pick the way I want to. Stop trying to control everything!

The scan lands on Fox News during Glenn Beck’s program.

Dictionary: You sure you don’t want to change the channel?

Thesaurus: Didn’t I say stop trying to run stuff? Just sit there and watch. Ooh, goody, he’s making an acronym on a chalk board of the topics he’s going to talk about later. SCORE!

Dictionary: Looks like the words are Obama, The Left, Internationalist, Graft, Acorn, Revolutionaries and Hidden Agendas.

Thesaurus: Now he’s circling letters and he’s going to make an acronym. See this is right up our alley.